Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
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