I could make wine with my vomit
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
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