Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
zippers are such a cool invention
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
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