Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You dont lie about slip and slides
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize