She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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