i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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