he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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