I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize