So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
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Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
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no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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