I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize