you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
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