bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize