the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize