Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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