I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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