Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
So. Much. Porn.
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