Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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