youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize