oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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