I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize