Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We had sex on a dog bed..
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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