You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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