I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize