something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize