I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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