I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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