Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize