I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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