It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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