So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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