he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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