We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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