You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize