A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
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