Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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