'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize