my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize