the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
someone get that fucking seahorse.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
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