The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
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I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
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I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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