"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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