Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize