singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
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Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
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Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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