it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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