So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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