can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
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