i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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