Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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