'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
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