I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
The cop let us off with a warning because I had more Twitter followers than he did. The future is terrifying.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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