ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
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